Still Waters

I want to go back to DC.

When I moved here, I was ready to make California my home.  I would marry here, raise a family here, retire here.  I practiced my hair flip and fitting “like” into a sentence 12 times…I was Californian to the core.  People told me to give it five months before letting the homesick feelings freak me out.  They said it would take about that long to feel comfortable in a place, regardless of how much I want to be there.  So when the slower pace and slower lifestyle and the alarming resemblance to my hometown made me miss DC, I waited.  And waited.

…and waited.

I want to go back to DC.  I want to go back to DC as soon as possible.  During down times at work, I surf USAjobs for announcements I would qualify for and I peruse the internet for condos in Virginia, that are in my price range.  I was just starting to adjust, when I left DC.  I’d gotten plugged into an amazing church and I had a job that took me into Virginia everyday and reminded me of all the reasons why I first fell in love with the area.  Since leaving, I’ve struggling with the lingering question, “Did I leave DC too soon?”

The truth is…I don’t really know.  Maybe I did. Maybe there were great things God had planned for me to help Him with, in the Metro DC area.  But everything happens for a reason – a believer in an Almighty God, wouldn’t believe that something as random as chance brought me here.  Every aspect of moving to California fell into place too perfectly to deny that it was masterminded by Someone greater than me.  Moving to California has allowed me to catch my breath.  And it’s allowed me to leave the temptation of the lifestyle I’d begun living, behind me and rededicate my life to Christ.  Moving to California has been like a fresh start.  I left behind two years of sinking into the waves, because I’d taken my eyes off Christ.

I’ve been here for almost six months already and I feel refreshed, reinvigorated and raring to go.  I have to constantly (and I do mean constantly) remind myself that I need this time, I’m not strong enough yet and that my timing is not God’s timing.  I have to remember to let God do his work in my life and in my heart.  God has brought me to this place to rest in Him and I am too busy looking forward to getting back in the game to actually enjoy it!

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.  He makes me to lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside the still waters.  He restores my soul, He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake.” ~Psalm 23: 1-3

I hope (daily, actually) that God will return me to the Metro DC area.  I believe I’ll be at my best and be of real use to Him there. In the meantime, though, I want to remember that God is making me lie down and restore my soul.  He’s led me to still waters…I don’t want Him to shake His head, chuckle and say, “I can lead a horse to water, but I can’t make her drink!” :]

Love y’all,

~M~